Trust Me!

So this last week was completely crazy. I feel like there are so many opportunities that are coming my way and I simply cannot do all of them. They all seemed amazing and I wanted to take them ALL! I  know... I'm kind of greedy. Haha

Anyway, so to start off, I randomly came upon a position to be the Vice President for AAF (American Advertising Federation) on BYU-Idaho's campus. It's a huge nation wide federation that ALL of the big companies are apart of. There is nothing better than this to go on a resumé. Next, I applied for an opportunity to take photos at various events on campus AND I get credit to do it while building my portfolio! It was perfect.

Then there is a new ward and calling and lots of reading for my classes and trying to meet people and finding time to go to the temple and visiting teaching and service and keeping in contact with people from my mission and a million other great things that I want to do.

I was feeling a little stressed about how to do everthing so I was parking to know what to focus on and how to know what to do and what is most important because certain things are easy to prioritize but other things, I just wasn't sure what should be more important.

Katie and I did baptisms on Saturday and it was nice going back down to the baptismal font. There was a new convert there with her apartment and they were all doing family names for another lady who had about 30 names to do. I just felt the spirit so strong as I watched all of the baptisms. The temple president talked about how if all of the temples operated at the same capacity as the Rexburg temple, it would take over 1,000 years to complete all of the names we have to do. That's a lot of work to do. He just mentioned how important it was to come to the temple.

I didn't get any big impressions, I just got this little feeling that said, "Trust Me!" It really impacted me that the Lord guides me so much in little ways and I need to not worry. I need to do my best every day and trust him. I can't do everthing, but what I do end up doing, trust in Him that it is enough.

I am so grateful for the temple and the blessings it brings to our lives!

Hard things can be Great!

This Week..... From everyone coming home and some not ever being able to get home (Jamie) and then everyone leaving, but not everyone because Juju is still in school and school starting and the emotions of EVERYTHING that has happened over the past two years,  AND then knowing that there is so much happening in the future (and some in the near future with becoming a grandma) I was emotionally spent. THEN with Grandpa going into the hospital and thinking everything was going to work out and then have it turn and wanting Rachel to get home from the Philippines and Julie to get here from Texas and then thinking we wouldn't get permission to bring him home and then that he wouldn't survive the trip home to now he is home....I feel like I was in a whirlwind that got sucked into another whirlwind!

I have felt love, love from my Heavenly Father when he somehow makes things work out when I know I was not in control or even capable of controlling (which I love to do). I have felt love as my husband in a moment of frustration when I just needed to vent starts talking like he understands and so many times he doesn't and I get even more frustrated and alone says just what I needed to hear to give me comfort. I have felt grateful, grateful for so many things - just getting through each day and not getting discouraged or depressed, Grandpa, Danny's cancellation, hearing Katie say "I love it here Mom" (which makes me full of joy and an ounce of sad), and having you guys call me and let me know what's going on or feeling connected through texts. Grateful that Jamie's insurance went through, that even though I didn't do much for Cassie's birthday on Monday I was able to share with her how much I love her. Grateful that my husband is ok with me not accomplishing much each day, even though I've been busy all day and I'm exhausted.  I have been so grateful - everything I have wanted I have gotten and now because I want more, I want to be grateful and humble for all that I've been given. 

As I've said to Grandpa "I need you to tell one more boy to turn his life around, like you have so many others, including my son"; I want George to turn and be in the correct position to deliver. I want Jon to get the news that he can have his Priesthood reinstated.  I know the Lord is waiting to give us blessings if only we qualify ourselves. My job is to qualify myself. I have fasted today for that purpose. Obedience brings blessings, but exact obedience brings miracles. I am working very hard to have that. I want to love like I've been loved, see good when the bad may be staring me in the face and have one thing more... a grateful heart.

How can something hard be so Great? Really?!!! We have done so many hard things and they've all be great. I am grateful for those hard things that have brought be great joy. Rachel spoke in the YSA Ward today and I went because I know from you guys that you share different things and I wanted to hear about her mission. It also makes me so proud of my children who have served missions - and proud of all of us for the support we all have given each other. Anyways in her talk she shared a scripture. (I didn't remember and how Dad remembers when he's always half asleep, he amazes me). It is John 3:30, "He must increase, but I must decrease." Gosh, I just loved that! He must increase. "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." And then... I MUST decrease. Decrease because he fills my soul and stretches and heals my heart and as I decrease I find that I am more like him and less like the world. He is there with me and in me and beside me. It's been a hard week and it's been a great week! And this next week will be GREAT!

xo Mommy

"You are the center of every groups attention"

So I did it! I am done with my first week of college, and lets just say all the boys want me but are too intimidated by my beauty. Haha just kidding... but really I hope that's the reason. So I have made quite a few new friends and I am grateful for the people I get to spend time with. I really like my roommates, they are AWESOME. Anywho, I am just happy with the way school is going, I feel like I am in a good place, and am doing well, so thank goodness.  There isn't a lot going on socially, but I love it here. It is soooooooooo beautiful.

PS the title was my fortune cookie... PERFECT, RIGHT???

Blessings of being healthy, and just blessings on blessings!

So as many of you know I sprained my ankle pretty good last week. I have been trying to be more healthy recently, and exercising and all. Well, I was able to walk on my ankle the very next day, tenderly with a pretty good limp, but I saw this as a huge blessing. One I could attribute to the word of wisdom. My ankle is doing much better now. Something from Michelle is, yesterday we sang "Because I have Been Given Much", which reminded her of how much we have been given, having received the letter for the sealing cancellation this past week, being apart of such wonderful families, having a great ward, having great friends, having a job even though she has to talk to "eediots" and drive with "eediots" everyday haha. We are extremely grateful for all that we have! Love you all!

Honesty

This week has been simple, good, and touched with miracles. A quiet birthday but I didn't mind. Going to dinner with Eden and Dakota- a few people came over on Friday and it was what I needed. My friend, Vladi took me out to ice-cream on Monday! A little get together with mission people I didn't know. Seeing people her and there keeps me going. Meeting a girl that has family in my ward in Kauai. Being social even when I would just rather stay in the apartment. Finally getting a hold of a marshales family after trying 5 numbers that have all been disconnected. Realizing that the best part of a mission wasn't being apart of building their faith but was finally understanding that my faith was growing because of their action. My whole purpose was to help them, strengthen them, make suer that when they fell they could get back up again. I see now that they strengthened me so much more than I eve realized. No longer do I see them everyday- no longer am I working with someone that closely everyday. I went to the Ogden Temple Rededication yesterday and cried as I thought of all the people that don't have a temple. Here in Utah we have how many? I know that people use them and so they are needed but what about all of the people that can't go because its too far, too expensive, or is life threatening. No sacrifice is too great to receive the blessings of the temple. Then President Monson spoke and said, "It is in the temple that we find purpose."

What is the point of honesty? I have taken to being a bit like dad - if it isn't good news there is no point in bringing it up. Yes I am psychoanalytical with me usually being the person of observation. I am constantly wondering why I do what I do; what are my motives or what are my fears? Sometimes I say, "I am fine." because if I talk then Ill cry- and  I dont want to cry yet. I know I will be fine but for now I am dealing with stuff I dont want to. I am here because Heavenly Father told me I had to be- not because I want to be. Ya school is great- I like my classes- its fun seeing my friends and making new ones and I am supposed to be here BUT that does not mean that I want to be here. Sometimes I dont even care if I go back to Hawaii- what I miss the most is a purpose that isn't mine. I just want to graduate and go work for an orphanage and help someone. I hate the fact that school has to come first. I hear of an internship that goes to Africa and want to go because its not here- its not about me. I have a friend in Bolivia that works with children that have been abandoned because their parents couldn't take care of them and I want to go and help. No offense Provo, but you don't need me- I am just one of the many here that have a strong testimony, is a good person, and reaches out to the one. Honesty is hard when you don't even know what you are feeling- one moments everything is fine the next is crying. Yes, I am fine I am just trying to figure out myself, again. So for now, I feel a bit lost- I feel like I am facing and walking in the right direction; but, what am I striving for? I don't know. What I do know is that if the prophet says the temple will help me find purpose then to the temple I will go. I don't know where this major will take me or what I will end up doing with my life- if I will stay here in the US or if I will be needed somewhere else. I guess I will keep walking until Heavenly Father tells me to stop, turn, or until I reach where He has always intended me to be.
    Love Always,
         Cassidy Lang

39 weeks

So, I feel like I dont have a ton of news this week.

Baby George was breach a week and a half ago. Last Wednesday he was diagonal- the doctor jokingly said he must be confused. At the Doctor's recommendation I'm doing acupuncture tomorrow... or rather some moxa treatment with 10 acupuncture needles to relax me for the moxa treatment. The doctor and his wife say that this one practice in town has a higher success rate of turning the baby around than 'manual aversion'- which the Dr can try if tomorrow doesnt work but I guess it's more painful than acupuncture.

Medicaid pulled through! One huge stress gone. This means the delivering a baby won't be so hard financially.

I'm still praying Jon ends up working at BYU-I starting January. Wednesday Jon got a phone call from them saying that they had only recieved one of his reference letters. So at least they like his application enough to follow through on that. When Jon applied online it asked for email addresses for references and said that they would send a form via email to the references. Well Jon got one of his references to email the application committee and when he talked to the third they said they had filled it out online. Brother Tibbs is in charge of the Institute here and has worked with Jon when Jon conducted the Institute choir and other things. Brother Tibbs called Idaho and although he didnt tell us details he said that they found his reference letter and had a really good conversation- which sounds promising.... if nothing else pulls through we might stay here since his job in Illinois wants to find him more classes to teach. We wouldnt stay permanently but just boost up his resume a little more to help us make it back west.

Today we had Stake Conference and I found it reassuring, that we've done our part in making the most of where we are, that in a spread out stake, I knew the new Stake President and one of his new counselors. Jon got a chance to briefly tell him what's been happening and to look for word from the First Presidency. I think he'll be good.

I think that's all the news I have. Still trying to organize things before the baby comes. :)